OOC BURNT OUT

(Major whiny post, please do disregard. I am keeping it up as to show what a bitch I am when I am feeling all butt hurt.)

May as well quit the island... the second person just messaged me and told me they were going to move on from my characters because I have been on hiatus due to being burnt out and stress. I told them I would be back, I just needed to sort my shit out, not good enough for them. Okay, let me break it down for everyone.

I am BURNT OUT. Anytime I get on, I either get hounded for attention then guilt-tripped if I am busy.... or I get out and out ignored. I am sorry. It burnt me out because I also had a shit ton of stress IRL. I don't mean, "Meh... just a little stressed." but... "If one more thing goes wrong, I will seriously swallow every pill in this fucking house and slit my wrists up to the elbow and then jump off a bridge." Yes. I am DEAD serious. Some of you have been understanding but too many have not been.

I am beyond pissed off that I can not appease you all, I want nothing more than to get online, spend time with you all and not feel like I am drowning in my damn problems. I HATE feeling like this. I love Improbable Island, but when I am suffering like this, I can not go on there or I will get myself banned. So, if you are going to move on from my characters, fine, safe journeys to you and your kin. If you give a damn and stay, then thank you.

(I am not going to quit, I am mostly just ranting and getting it out instead of letting it build and fester. Yes, I had a mental breakdown and went into hiding but doing so just made the problem worse. By hiding, it made it build and fester. People HAVE reached out to me, wanting to help me but due to how I was thinking and feeling, I was blind to it. Those that did leave, they were right to do so. I was being a petulant ass-hat and not listening. Am I ready to return to the island? Far from it but I do need to TRY. If I TRY but fail, then so be it. Better to try then fail than not try and fail automatically. I am a real mess but, I do not want to be like this.

Those that want time with Xan, you will get time when I am able to give it. She has many people she has to see, people that mean a lot to her or she loves. If you get butt-hurt and leave, well, you knew the risk... yeah, I will feel like shit but not so much that you left but that I made you feel like you were not worthwhile. Those that want to see Talla, she needs to get out and see others... I need to cultivate her REAL personality and I can't do that by keeping her in hiding. Those waiting to see Taeko, she too needs to cultivate her personality. Xander Vega.... I need to find his password again. Lady Envy lost her password too. Actually, several of my alts need to be remade but I am not in any rush unless I need them immediately and since only Xan, Talla, and Taeko get much attention, those are the ones I will be on the most. Please understand I do have a real life and I also have issues mentally that hinder me. Also, know that if I am having to be on two characters at the same time, I am likely to be slow at typing because it doesn't update right.)